Giver or Taker?

Adam Grant

Which are you? “Giver” or “Taker”? 

This is a fantastic question and often overlooked when working, we all see it but do we do anything about it?

Most of us find we are on or the other, I am definitely a “giver”, I put everyone else’s needs before my own. It is a generous and good thing to do except when it’s at the cost of ones “self”. People who give all the time are often drained and unfortunately taken advantage of by “takers”.

“Takers” are not bad, they just have a more narrowed view the world and surroundings, looking for opportunities to beat out others or do something for themselves over helping others. I am not saying that “takers” do not help others per say, I am just stating that “takers” tend to be a little more “me” focused that “us” focused.

“ME” or “US”

These two words are a trigger for me when I listen to people when they talk and how much they use words like “I”, “me”, “mine” or other possessive nouns.

When I meet someone who is always tooting their horn, always “bragging/boasting” about what they did or always needing to be in the spotlight. I don’t try to keep up or foster a friendship with that person.  It usually does not do much for me as in the way of friendship; those relationships tend to leave me empty and unsatisfied. I am giving all of myself to someone else and their goals. Leaving mine again on the back burner.

I ask myself these few questions, “What will I gain from this relationship?  Will I be happy or drained? Can my friendship be beneficial to both of us or just one? My actions, will they be reciprocated by this person?  If the answer is “NO” to any of those questions…I RUN… RUN like the wind.

I have been there, done that and don’t ever want to do that again. It’s not a healthy relationship to be in.

Be True to Yourself

A good radar to judge how much of a “taker” someone can or might be. I have started to really separate myself from people who talk too much in the “I or ME” realm.

I am also in introvert, my energy is easily drained when around others, and drained faster by a “taker”.

We need “givers” and “takers” in this world, but we also need to have balance in ourselves. I truly believe that we used to be the world where more “givers” were around, however, the tide has turned to more “takers”. We need a balance and then I believe the world will carry out so much more when people are not one-upping or getting competitive with people who don’t have time for that.

above is a lot of my opinion about this subject, it may not be what you believe and that is ok. This is more to make people aware. And like I said before, neither a “giver” or “taker” is a bad thing. Just different

Author: Jesy Anderson

The owner of Needle, Ink and Thread, Located in Beavercreek, Ohio. I love teaching, it really is my passion. The "lightbulb" moments are my favorite! I am so excited to share my passion of sewing, design, and art with you! I was also a former co-owner of Sew Dayton.

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